I grew up with religion and a lot of it. I went to the school, wore the uniforms, performed the acts, walked the steps, all of it. You name it, I did it.
And then I had a heart change. It's not religion. It's just that, a heart matter. As a kid who struggled with confidence and my own self worth, my faith helped me see that I do matter. I am important. I believed in God, but I didn't know Him until then. Now, I know God, and He knows me. And that changed my life.
2 Timothy 2:19 Nevertheless the foundation of God standeth sure, having this seal, The Lord knoweth them that are his.
I John 4:10 Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
My faith is the reason, even though I was terrified and devastated about Kamdyn's diagnosis after she was born, I knew I would be ok. I knew that God would see me through. I'm not gonna lie, though. There were times I felt pretty hopeless, and I questioned what God was doing. I remember standing in my kitchen with my mom, sobbing, and saying, "I just don't know why God would do this to us." Now, I see more than ever that He gave us Kamdyn FOR us, and I am thankful every day.
Isaiah 42:16-17 And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them.
My faith is the reason that I don't worry about what will happen to Kamdyn when I am gone. Every person has value to God, and we teach our children this. I have no doubt in my mind that our children will never see Kamdyn as a burden. They will see her as their sister, that they love, and nothing else.
My faith is the reason that when I start to compare Kamdyn to other children her age, and I start to get down or even sad, I remind myself that God has a plan for her. That plan may not be my plan, but that's ok.
My faith is the tool I use to fight guilt. When I feel like maybe I'm not giving her the right therapies or vitamins or toys or methods or whatever, I can find peace, because
Isaiah 26:3 Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee."
Everyday I do the best that I know how to for Kamdyn, but my trust is in God and not myself or what I do.
So that's a little about my faith and Down syndrome. And here are some more pictures of our trip to the pumpkin patch today:
