31 for 21: What I want people to get

A few of us decided to coordinate our efforts for 31 for 21 or whatever it's called, and write on the same topic each Thursday.  I'll admit that today's topic of "What I want I want people to get" is tricky for me.  Truthfully, I'd rather go back to last week, because that was easy.

It's tricky, because when I find myself irritated or hurt about something that was said or asked, after I think about it, I realize that if it hadn't been said or asked, I wouldn't have had the opportunity to educate or inform them.  And as for the idiots out there, who say ignorant, hateful things, I have to not allow myself to care if they get it, because they don't want to get it.  And as far as the well-meaning morons people.  You know, the one's who make ridiculous, uneducated comments or use the word retard. Most of them are harmless.  But they just don't "get it," and I can't really blame them.

 It took holding Kamdyn in my arms for me to get it.  It took me looking into Kamdyn's crystal blue eyes to understand what was so hurtful about the word retard.  It took looking into Kamdyn's face to understand that that word takes away everything that she is: her spunky nature, her contagious smile, her heart-warming laugh, her funny faces, her love of cuddling, her intense love of french fries.  That one word takes all that away. Every connotation that word encompasses is negative and devaluing.

It took having a baby with a heart defect to understand how foolish the statement, "All I want is a healthy baby" when I was pregnant.  Really, all I wanted was MY baby, whoever that was meant to be, heart defect, Down syndrome, or not. 

So rather than go into the guy who stared just a little too long in the line at McDonald's last week, the woman who asked if I would have "done something about it", if I had know Kamdyn had Down syndrome while I was pregnant, or anything else that has happened over the last 18 months, I decided to go a different route with this post.

And with all that said, what do I want people, the people in Kamdyn's life, "to get"?

I want you to get that when you watch Kamdyn do a sign, and you say how smart she is,

You make my heart soar.

When you look at her and tell her how beautiful she is or how cute she is,

You make my day.

And when you tell me how great a job I'm doing,

You help me feel like maybe I'm doing ok, even if 5 minutes later, I feel like I have no idea what in the world I'm doing.

And one day, when you bend down and ask her how she's doing, even if she doesn't answer back,

You are telling her (and me) that she matters.

These are the things that matter to me.  These are the moments that brighten our day.